Get-through-your-Monday Girl Time - SuperMom Catherine Allison

Hello, Monday friends! I´m glad to have you back for another round of Get-through-your-Monday Girl Time! Today I am sharing one of my best friends with you, so you should feel very lucky! I have known this sweet lady since we were in high school together, and we have shared our lives since then, sometimes during sleepovers and soccer practice, and sometimes through facebook chat prayer requests from 3,000 miles away. Catherine, or Cathy as I know her, is a wonderful woman of God who strives to be the best she can be for her family, and she is a great encouragement to me! I hope you find her sweet, bubbly personality an encouragement as well! You can also read more from Cathy at her blog here. Enjoy!
Ashley

Tell us a little bit about yourself. Who are you?
Hello! My name is Catherine Allison. I am a blessed wife to an amazing husband, a happy mama to 2 beautiful children, and a saved woman by God’s grace. I was adopted at the age of 13, baptized at 16, married my best friend at the age of 21, and had my first child at the age of 23. My life has been one joyous and adventurous ride that I wouldn’t change for anything!

Tell us about your family.
I married my best friend/high school sweetheart my sophomore year in college. It was a beautiful happy day when we became Man and Wife! There were many happy tears shed that day! My husband is the worship leader at the church we attend along with serving as a Deacon. His job consists of him filming, producing and writing commercials for cable television. I stay home loving on my precious family, teaching them God’s beautiful truths, and serving my husband. I also teach the toddler Sunday school at our church. We have 2 children: J and E. J is 3, and E is 6 months. We strive to love Jesus together as a family, and we make it our goal to portray the gospel by the way we love and serve one another through our family.
How many children do you have, and what are their ages?
We have 2 children: J and E. J is 3, and E is 6 months.

This is an interview about motherhood, but your motherhood is shaped a lot by your marriage. How would you describe your relationship with your husband?
My relationship with my husband is based on grace. We love each other completely, and strive every day to serve one another the best we know how by God’s grace. We always look for ways to encourage each other, pray with each other, and speak God’s word into each other’s lives. We have been married for 5 years, and are still madly in love.

What is the hardest thing about being married?
We are told in the book of Colossians that wives are to be submissive to their husbands, as to the Lord. Ephesians also teaches this doctrine of family. As wives, we are commanded to be submissive and honoring to our husbands. However, we know that the curse on Eve, which was extended to all of God’s creation, would be that woman’s desire would be to rule over her own husband. This has been so true in my marriage at times, and I have had to repent several times because of this. The fact that we are commanded to submit and honor our husband makes it that important to God. This truly is one of the hardest things about being married: Being submissive and honoring to my husband, as is fitting in the Lord.

What is the best thing about being married?
My husband is my perfect helpmeet. He guides, leads, encourages and prays for his family. He speaks scripture into our lives. The best thing about being married to him is simply just getting to be his wife. I realize this probably sounds cliché, but seriously, I truly am one blessed woman to have him as my husband. He’s my best friend. He’s the man I get to spend all my days with, the man I get to watch raise our children by teaching them the joys of serving the Lord, the man I look forward to coming home to everyday just to chat with, cry with, and laugh with. He is the man I treasure; he is the man I want to make memories with that last a lifetime. I love being married to my best friend! I love that we get to serve the Lord together; that truly is the best thing about being married!

Describe a memory between you and your husband that really stands out in your mind.
I’ll never forget the moment when my husband became a father. It truly was the most beautiful picture. Watching the doctors place our boy into my husband’s arms, and watching my husband tear up and cheer that he’s a daddy made this Mama cry like a baby. At that moment, I realized I was one blessed woman. This moment is forever etched into my memory, and I wouldn’t trade it for anything.

How did your relationship with your husband change when you became parents?
Since becoming parents, my relationship with my husband has changed for the better. We have learned to be more patient with each other, show more grace to one another, and communicate better. Our love for each other has even deepened. My love and respect for my husband has grown stronger as I have watched him raise and teach our kids the joys of following the Lord. I have become more faithful in honoring and submitting to my husband’s direction and lead in our family as it relates to things like disciplining our children or how we should school our children, etc. My relationship with my husband has changed for the better!

How does your parenting style compare with your husband´s?
For the most part are parenting styles are pretty similar, and if they are not, we strive to make that happen. This is so that our children learn to respect both parents equally, and so that they can expect the same outcomes from both parents. However, if I were to point out one thing that was different in our parenting styles it would be grace and patience. My husband tends to show more grace and patience with our children than I do. I’m learning to be a mom that’s full of grace, and it’s definitely hard for me. It’s something I pray for everyday!

In what ways have you changed since you became a mother?
I would say I have definitely realized my need for Jesus more since being a mother. I have also had to rely more on Him for teaching me grace, patience and love. Prayer has become more a part of my life than ever before, and seeking His word has become more of a challenge, but necessary challenge in my life. Pray for me on this one friends and family! Spending time in God’s word and prayer is a necessary tool for living this life, and with children sometimes it can be hard to find time.

Describe a memory of pregnancy that stands out to you.
For both of my pregnancie it was the first time I felt them move. It was a joy of mine to get to feel them move in my womb. It was more of a real presence for me that I had a baby growing inside me; a baby I was truly grateful to have join our family.

Describe a memory of your first weeks of motherhood that stands out to you.
Late night feedings was a memory I didn’t expect and enjoy at first. I had such a hard time with this at first. When baby woke up wanting to nurse, I remember thinking to myself, “Please just go back to sleep. Mommy is so tired. I need to sleep.” This was when I realized how selfish of a person I was, putting my needs first before my child’s needs. Don’t get me wrong, I knew I was selfish before, but having a baby magnified it so much more. Now, I just cherish the moments I have with my daughter and son, because I know life is short and precious, and I know our children aren’t babies forever. I am only able to do this of course by God’s grace. It’s through his strength that I am able to love, care for and noursih my children, because without Him I would be a total failure.

In what ways has your parenting style changed with each child?
Since becoming a mom of two, I think I have become much more relaxed with life in general. I’m not so stir crazy when things go array, and when the house seems like everything is a mess from all the dishes being dirty, six loads of laundry needing to be folded and put away, and children toys, books, games, etc. sporadically tossed (or so it seems) all over the house.

As far as parenting two children, I think maybe I’ve encouraged more independence in my son, and tried teaching him to do some things on his own more without Mommy’s help. I have also seen myself relax more with him. I am not so uptight when his room is a mess; the house is a mess due to his messy concoctions, game playing, etc, and when he gets super dirty from painting, playing outside, etc. Overall, I would like to say I am more fun to be around now!

In what ways are your children similar to each other and in what ways are they different?
I’m pretty sure my children were twins separated by almost 3 years of life. My son and daughter look identical, and have very similar personalities. Both, so far, were/are easy, easy babies. Neither one of them cry(ied) a lot, had weird sleeping habits, etc. They both were/are very happy babies, and smile and laugh a lot. E is a lot more content by herself  than J was being by himself. He didn’t hate it, but he wouldn’t play on his own for more than 10 minutes at a time without getting upset or throwing a fit. E can be left a lone for a long time (close to 30 minutes), and she is happy. We don’t make a habit with leaving E alone, but I do let her jump in her Jumperro for 15-20 minutes in the morning and afternoon while I do some “tot school” with J. She is totally ok with this, too! E also learned to self-soothe at 2-months, so she didn’t need Mommy’s touch/help every time she is/was upset like J did when he was a baby. She is a thumb sucker, and J liked the pacifier. There are definitely pros/cons of both, but man I’m loving that E is a thumb sucker, that’s for sure!

In what ways are your children similar to you? In what ways are they different from you?
My children are very much like their Dad and me. I would say though that their dramatic behavior when things don’t always go their way is more similar to my behavior, because their father never stresses out or gets upset. It’s pretty incredible how he leads such a stress free life. I pray, by God’s grace, I am able to do that this year. Both of my children are/were easy babies, and for the most part my husband and I were as well. My children are happy and cheerful most of the time, and I’d like to say the same goes for my husband and me. Both of my children are also very athletic, and their father and I were in high school. We still play sports occasionally, but we’re so out of shape, so it’s not often that we do. Lord willing, this will be changing in the New Year! My son is musically talented. This he gets from his father, and not from me. My son is also a very organized toddler. This he gets from me. I think it’s because I taught him to be that way at such a young age…haha!

For each of your children, share one of your favorite memories.
There are always too many favorite memories to list from your child’s life, so I’ll pick out a few:
For J one of my favorite memories was when he first started walking, and he toddled over to me with a big smile on his face, gave me the biggest hug, and then promptly kissed me (snot and all) on my cheek. It was gross, but I loved every minute of it.

Hearing him say, “I wuv you, Mommy,” for the first time is something I will never forget.

Hearing his first cry the day he was born is something I can’t explain, nor do I think anyone can explain. It did something to me. I will forever hold on to that memory so etched into my brain.

Seeing my husband became a father for the first time was definitely a favorite memory. Watching him carry his son, J, out to meet his family for the first time is a memory I’ll never forget.

For E it was her first cry, her first smile, and her first sneeze. It was seeing her Daddy totally smitten by her. Babies are simply adorable and loving, and she is by far one of the most loving and happiest babies I have ever known. She provides lots of joy in our family! We are so thankful God blessed us with her!

Describe a moment as a mother where you felt overwhelmed.
Again. There have been, and will probably be several more moments where I feel completely overwhelmed and not adequate enough to be a mother, which bare with me on this one, I’m not adequate to be a mother, and life isn’t going to be easy-especially for those who belong to Christ. It is only be God’s grace that I’m able to love, care for, teach and nurture my children. Without God in my life, I wouldn’t be the mother I am today, and my family wouldn’t be the family they are today, because apart from Him we are nothing. It is by His grace, His son’s blood on the cross, and His victory over Satan that I can stand and be a good mom. It is through His strength that I can overcome the hardships and trials as a mother. It’s because of Him that when my son was diagnosed with a severe peanut and milk allergy I was able to believe and trust in His word and promise that He’s a good God. His plans are perfect. That somehow these allergies would bring Him glory. So yes, I’ve been overwhelmed many times, and yes, there are some that stand out more than others (like J’s constant battle with peanut and milk allergies), but I rest assured in His promises that He’s a good God, His plans are perfect, and He will redeem His people! Praise God for that! I look forward to His return when all pain, suffering, sickness and death will be vanquished! Come Lord Jesus!

What are your favorite ways to relax when you need a little break?
My favorite ways to relax when I need a little break are too many to list, and not enough time for me to get to do them during the day…lol! Anyhow, I love spending time in prayer, God’s word and listening to a sermon or podcast while resting on the couch during the kid’s naps. Most of the time, I fall asleep myself. That is simply fabulous when I get a nap in during the day. I’m not going to lie though about my favorite way to relax. I enjoy sitting on the couch or in my recliner with my feet propped up reading a good book or watching a fabulous television show. Love those rare moments when that happens. I also enjoy shopping, eating chocolate and getting a manicure as a way to relax. Please don’t judge…lol!

What has been the hardest lesson you have had to learn as a mother?
Patience. I have never been a very patient person (just ask Ashley, she can tell you), and raising a toddler calls for that character quality for sure. I still struggle with this, and pray every day that God would make me more patient, more like Him as He relates to His people. I do know I have developed more patience since becoming a mother, but it’s nowhere perfect or close to where it should be. Praying this changes in my life.

What has been the hardest experience you have gone through as a mother? What did that experience teach you?
The one that stands out to me the most is my son’s constant battle with severe peanut and milk allergies.  If given a drink of milk or one peanut, he can go into anaphylactic shock, which ultimately can kill him.  I can’t tell you how many close calls we have had, and how on edge I tend to be when we go new places. This is a battle I hated at first, and was angry with God at first, but now I see how God has used this for His good. He has drawn my family and I closer to Him, He has caused us to be smart and healthy with what we eat, and ultimately, He has turned us into a prayer warrior family. I find myself always praying for my children, for their ultimate healing, which is their salvation, but also for J’s healing with his allergies. If you’re a prayer warrior, then feel free to pray the same.

Looking back on your life as a mother, what, if anything, do you regret?
I have only been a mother for 3-years, so I don’t feel like there is much too look back on in my mothering life, but what I do know is this that there have been many times where I haven’t been patient and loving to my children. This I regret. I pray to change this. I hope to change this. I long to change this. I want to be like Christ as He is with His people. I want my children to see the love of Jesus in me as I love for, care for, and nurture them.

What do you think is the most important quality in a mother?
A mother who loves with a Christ like love, prays for her children daily, and devotes her time to her family is something to be admired. One who seeks Jesus in all of life is something to be talked about, and something I pray that I do. A mother who serves her family happily, and rejoices always is important as well!

What do you think children need most from their mothers?
LOVE, because without love everything is meaningless. (1 Corinthians 13)

Get-Through-Your-Monday Girl Time - SuperMom Theresa Fuller

Well, here ya go kids, another wonderful interview for our ¨Get-through-your-Monday Girl Time!¨ I had so much fun reading this interview, and I think you will, too. I remember babysitting Theresa´s first daughter when she was just a toddler, and I was probably in middle school! It´s fun to read about their ups and downs as a family, what it means to grow up, and how to make cleaning the house an adventure! So grab your cup of coffee, or whatever your guilty pleasure is, and take a few minutes out for girl time! Enjoy!
-Ashley

Tell us a little bit about yourself. Who are you?
I’m Theresa Fuller. I’m a stay-at-home mom and I’m currently working on my Bachelor’s Degree in Healthcare Administration.

Tell us about your family.
I’ve been married for 9 years to my husband, Stephen. We met in the Army National Guard about ten years ago and fell in love at first sight. Not really, though… Actually he asked me out a bunch of times, I said no a bunch of times, and then my car broke down and he just happened to stop to help me, so I was forced to say yes when he asked me out again.  Then, we were a bit careless and a couple months later while he was in Korea I sent him an email, “We need to talk when you get home.” He responded with, “Are you pregnant?” The answer was yes… And that should make the math easier for anyone who starts doing the math on the next question…

How many children do you have, and what are their ages?
Stephanie, 9 years; Christopher, 8 years; Makenzie, almost 5 years

This is an interview about motherhood, but your motherhood is shaped a lot by your marriage. How would you describe your relationship with your husband?
We have a lot of fun. We play fight and argue and joke around constantly. People often think we’re arguing, when really we’re just joking around with one another. We enjoy each other´’s company and love laughing at/with each other. When we actually argue, it rarely lasts long. We’ve been through some rough times, especially after his dad died, and I think we both seriously considered divorce for a good year, but we stuck it out and now we’re a lot happier.

What is the hardest thing about being married?
I think the hardest part for us is disciplining the children together. We both have different ideas on parenting and he’s quick to discipline while I’m quick to just talk to the kids about what they’re doing wrong. I base more importance on communication and he bases more importance on punishment so that they’ll learn from their mistakes.

What is the best thing about being married?
The best thing about being married is having someone to share things with. Whether something good happens, or something bad happens, he’s always the first one I want to tell.

Describe a memory between you and your husband that really stands out in your mind.
As I mentioned before, we barely knew each other when I got pregnant. I was 19 years old and we hadn’t seen each other for weeks because he was in Korea. He got back home and I expected him to say he wanted nothing to do with the baby or me. I even thought he might bring up adoption or abortion. I was terrified and thought I was going to have to have my baby and take care of it alone. I was also self-conscious because I was so skinny when I got pregnant that I was starting to show already.

We went on a date and talked and I don’t remember much of that at all, but afterwards he drove me back to my car. I remember still expecting to never see him again, but before I got into my car he put his arms around me and hugged me. We stood in a parking lot next to my car, under the stars, and he just held me for what seemed like forever. I remember thinking to myself, “Wow, I might be able to fall in love with this guy.” And then I did…

How did your relationship with your husband change when you became parents?
Since our story isn’t the normal story of love, marriage, babies, we didn’t really know one another very well by the time I had Stephanie. She was born prematurely and was in NICU for a while before she came home on an apnea monitor. Stephen and I were clearly both still kids before she was born, but as soon as she was born we both grew up quite a bit. He woke up with me every 2 hours to go back to the hospital and feed Stephanie, and he made sure I ate enough and took care of myself. We started really relying on each other after Stephanie was born, and I finally realized not only how much I loved him, but how much he loved me. He’d asked me to marry him before, but I had said “no” because I didn’t want him to marry me just because I was pregnant. A week after Stephanie was born, he asked again, and I knew at that point that there was so much more to our relationship than just having a baby together. I said yes and we got married the next day.

How does your parenting style compare with your husband´s?
If the kids do something wrong, Stephen scolds them or makes them take a time out. I usually start with a warning or a discussion. I’m big on making them discuss their feelings, whereas he doesn’t. He jokes around with the kids more than I do, and they wrestle with each other all the time. He’d rather stay at home and play with the kids or work in the yard with them, but I like to take the kids places and try to avoid being at home with them if the weather’s nice.

In what ways have you changed since you became a mother?
I’ve become a million times more patient. I’ve changed so much that I don’t really know where to begin, but with each child I’ve become progressively more patient and understanding.

Describe a memory of pregnancy that stands out to you.
I loved being pregnant, so this is a difficult question to choose just one! Of course, I remember the first time I felt my babies move, and I remember the first time I put Stephen´s hand on my belly so that he could feel them move with each pregnancy… I guess one of my favorite memories is probably listening to Stephen read to my belly. He used to read Oh Baby, the Places You’ll Go to my belly every day. Right before I had Stephanie, he read it again and I cried the whole time.

Describe a memory of your first weeks of motherhood that stands out to you.
When Stephanie was 28 days old, Stephen deployed. I drove to Ft. McCoy, Wisconsin every single weekend with our tiny, premature newborn to make sure that he got to see her as many times as possible before he went overseas. I was never more than a few feet from Stephanie for the first few months because I couldn’t stand being away from both her and my husband.

In what ways has your parenting style changed with each child?
I’ve become less nervous about everything. Now I know that a fever is usually nothing to worry about, so I baby my kids and treat them, but I don’t panic. I still keep my kids close, and it still annoys me when I see other kids running free with no parents in sight, but I’ve learned that it’s okay if they climb a tree (not TOO high) and maybe fall and scrape a knee, etc. I’ve just generally allowed each kid to have a little bit more fun because I know that they might get hurt, but they can still play and have fun without getting hurt even if I don’t keep them on a tight leash.

In what ways are they similar to each other and in what ways are they different?
All three of my kids are very loving. They still randomly give me a hug or a kiss on the cheek and tell me that they love me. Stephanie’s feelings are easily hurt, and she’s quite the drama queen. Sometimes she’ll run off screaming that “nobody loves her,” but she’s quick to smile when I remind her that she’s actually very loved, even when she’s being dramatic. A small scolding is all she needs if she does something wrong. She’s so eager to please. Christopher is stubborn and has a temper. Scolding does little good, but grounding him from his favorite toys keeps him in line when needed. Makenzie is a trouble-maker. She’s quick to shed crocodile tears if she gets caught doing something wrong, and she’s usually the one who starts the arguments. She’s also hilarious. It’s hard to punish her without laughing most of the time.

All three of my kids are VERY polite. I love it when I receive compliments on their manners/behavior. It reminds me that I’m doing something right, and it makes them feel good about themselves, too!

In what ways are your children similar to you? In what ways are they different from you?
Remember that drama queen thing? Stephanie gets that from me. Christopher’s temper? That’s his dad. And Makenzie’s trouble-making ability? Also me. I call my mom and apologize weekly.

For each of your children, share one of your favorite memories.
How do I choose just one? This question has taken me forever because I feel like I make a new favorite memory every week.

I think for Stephanie, my favorite memory is my wedding. One of the NICU nurses brought Stephanie to the hospital chapel so that she could be there for Stephen and I’s last-minute wedding. I didn’t think she’d be allowed to go, so it was a huge, amazing surprise for me. I’ll always be grateful to that nurse for allowing us that memory.

Christopher- I think my favorite just happened a couple weeks ago. I took him to Turkey Run with my mother-in-law and his sisters and at the end of a great day (before he’d received a SINGLE present, mind you), he informed me that this was the BEST birthday ever, and told Makenzie that she should go there for her birthday, too.

Makenzie- I can’t choose a single memory of Makenzie… My favorite general memory about her was when she was a baby. From the time she was born, she was the fussiest, loudest baby. I knew she was my last, though, so I didn’t mind. I cuddled, rocked, patted, walked, soothed, and nursed her with such patience for so many months. I don’t know where I got the patience from, but I don’t remember ever feeling overwhelmed with her like I did with the other two. I enjoyed every single minute of it, even without any sleep.

Describe a moment as a mother where you felt overwhelmed.
When Stephen got on the bus to deploy, I’ve never felt so overwhelmed. I had this tiny baby, my new husband was going to go overseas, and I was very young. I really can’t describe how difficult it was for me to be strong for Stephanie, or how painful it was to see my husband cry as he told our little girl goodbye.

What are your favorite ways to relax when you need a little break?
I love a hot bubble bath and a good book. My kids might not have survived this long if not for hot water and books. Okay, they may have SURVIVED, but they might be in cages or something. (Kidding, I swear).

What has been the hardest lesson you have had to learn as a mother?
I think it’s that babies really DO grow up way too fast. I could elaborate, but I think any mom reading this already understands.

What has been the hardest experience you have gone through as a mother? What did that experience teach you?
I think this goes back to when Stephen deployed. It taught me that I could do more than I ever thought I could. I could handle more than I knew. It also taught me that things were no longer about me; they were about my baby(ies). I learned to rely on my family, and on my little girl for comfort because I didn’t have to do anything alone. I had other people.

Looking back on your life as a mother, what, if anything, do you regret?
I regret not getting antidepressants sooner after I had Christopher. I had postpartum depression and I didn’t realize it. Because of that, I barely remember the first 6 months of his life, really. I didn’t enjoy him as much as I should have. To be honest, I didn’t really even like him at first. I loved him, but I didn’t like him. That is my only regret.

What do you think is the most important quality in a mother?
Patience. If you become frustrated quickly or forget that these little people rely on you to teach them, you miss out on so many chances. Everything can be a learning experience, and with a little patience, everything can be fun.

What do you think children need most from their mothers?
Love, but that seems obvious.

What advice would you give to other mothers out there who are reading this interview?
You will make mistakes. So will your kids. Big deal! Learn from them, teach from them, and move on. Love every single minute. A friend of mine has metastatic breast cancer and 2 young girls. She lives every day with the sole purpose of making memories for her kids, and now I do, too. If something happens to me tomorrow, I know my kids will have amazing memories because I’ve helped make them.

Do you have any tips or tricks that have helped you stay organized, run your household or raise your kids more effectively?
Organized? Ha! I’m horrible with organization in all forms. Lately I’ve developed a policy… If I wake up one day and want to take the kids to the zoo, we go to the zoo. If the laundry isn’t folded, it can wait until we get home. If we stay home to clean the house, I put on loud music and we sing and dance while we clean. Everything should be an adventure. If you can do that with organization, great, but I’m better at doing it all “on the fly.”

Things You Forget to Remember, Continued

If you are a friend of mine on facebook, you probably know that my facebook account exists primarily for the purpose of recording all of the adorable things my daughter says until I can write them down somewhere. Now, I don´t know how much other people really care about reading my daughter´s quotes, but it doesn´t really matter. It´s mostly for me anyway.

I was amazed at how early she started saying things that I wanted to remember. So in my free moments, I think back to the things she has said that day or in the past few days that were special to me. Sometimes they are funny things, or sometimes they are things that reflect who she is as a person, and those are things that I don´t want to forget. But I will. And every so often there is a moment where I turn to my husband and say, ¨What was that funny thing Bella said this morning?¨ Sometimes we remember, sometimes we don´t. As a parent, you get this nagging feeling that your kids are growing up right in front of your eyes, every single day, and no matter how much you determine to remember, there will still be a million things you will forget.

It isn´t just the things they say. It´s in the looks they give you, the things they do, the moments you share. Sometimes, to an onlooker, that moment that you wish you could bottle up and save forever looks totally commonplace. It´s not all about the first steps or the first word. Really, it´s not about those moments at all. You know you will remember those, and, if you´re like me, you will probably have five thousand pictures and videos of those moments to help you remember in case you should get amnesia.

Tonight I was thinking, as I was putting my daughter down to sleep for the night, that sometimes it can even be the moments that you think, as you´re living them, are just annoying. Like when they won´t sleep, and you are pregnant and hot and you don´t really want anyone touching you and you just want this kid to fall asleep so you can have a little space! And then that little scoundrel, as if reading your mind, turns around, tucks one arm under you, and with the other hand, roughly pats your head, mimicking the way you stroke her hair as she falls asleep. Kids are great with that stuff. They diffuse you, just like that, and make you wonder what you were so annoyed about in the first place.

It´s the way they say. ¨I love you¨. Sometimes they actually say those words, but as wonderful as those words are, the meaning behind them is still developing. The real love a child gives her mother is active. It is given. It is returned to you in the way you give it to her. She learned to express love from you! I think that might be the most exciting thing about motherhood.

I love to watch my daughter play with her dolls and stuffed animals. She is attentive, thoughtful and affectionate. She is tender and loving. She speaks kindly to them, showers them with affection and cares for them meticulously. It makes me feel like I am doing something right. I am teaching her to be a mother.

Of course, she also picks up some of my bad habits. Ahem. So don´t think I´m bragging. I´m not.

I just love to see her blossom, and to know that I had something to do with that, even with all my flaws and failures.

I´m getting ready for the arrival of our second daughter, and just thinking about what I want to remember about Bella as she is right now. Soon she will be adding ¨big sister¨ to her list of experiences, and I´m glad for her. I think having a sibling is a blessing, and something that really helps develop character. But I´m also sad. Sad because while she will always be my baby, she will no longer be THE baby, and I know that will be difficult and confusing for her. I´m sad that we will never be just the two of us girls again. (Although I´m excited to be the three of us girls!) It´s a bittersweet time, and I´m trying to savor our last weeks as a twosome.

Some of Bella´s favorite things right now:

Stuffed animals of every variety, playing doctor, taking our order and making us a meal in her kitchen (algo más?), stickers, jewelry and TV (a relatively new discovery since in Ecuador we watch a total of 0 TV...)

Hugs, kisses, cuddles (cummy me, mommy!!), climbing all over me, trying to lick us (gross)

Ice water, fruit, candy (another USA discovery), meat of all kinds, pizza, donuts

Spiderman, but not Batman (he nasty, mommy)...and ¨Hulk for dadda¨ (Why? We don´t know...)

Trying to be bossy (I told you no, mommy!)

Beetles, but not spiders (I don´t yike it spiders)

Bathtime, especially with bubbles or colored water, but not getting out of the bath

Pink

Looking at herself in the mirror

Taking off her pants and running around the house in her undies


Shoes!!


Doing ¨exercises¨

Church, but only because the nursery has tons of toys. Ha.

Story time at the library (probably the thing I will miss most about the US)

Eating snow (another happy USA experience!)

Helping clean up (Me do it!)




Matt Redman, Toby Mac, Old MacDonald, Twinkle Twinkle, The Itsy Bitsy Spider, 5 Little Monkeys, ¨Yo soy¨...and others

Watching the ministry videos that daddy makes (Pa mano, papá!)



And I´m sure there is so much more! All of these things change and grow every day, just like she does, but sometimes it´s good to take a little snapshot, because there is so much that we forget to remember.

What are the things your children say or do that you want to be sure to remember?

Get-through-your-Monday Girl Time - SuperMom Allison Bohn

Hello, Monday! And hello, blog readers! Welcome back to our favorite little moment of the week, ¨Get-through-your-Monday Girl Time¨! Today we bring you another fun mommy interview, from a mommy who was recommended to me! I don´t know her personally, but we are friends on Facebook, so that is a good start. Just kidding. Actually we have several mutual friends, and this young lady comes highly recommended! I thoroughly enjoyed reading her interview and getting to know her, and I think her honest answers will be uplifting to you on this Monday! But don´t take my word for it--dive right in! Enjoy!

-Ashley

Tell us a little bit about yourself. Who are you?
My name is Allison Bohn. I have been married for almost 5 years to my amazing husband. I am very fortunate to be able to be a stay at home mom.

Tell us about your family.
I have two wonderful kids, and for the time being we are living in Maine. We are waiting for God to tell us where he wants us next.

How many children do you have, and what are their ages?
I have two children Hadassah 2 years, Aedan 2 months.

This is an interview about motherhood, but your motherhood is shaped a lot by your marriage. How would you describe your relationship with your husband?
I love my relationship with my husband. He is my best friend who I talk to about everything. We complete each other.

What is the hardest thing about being married?
Learning to give up control.

What is the best thing about being married?
Getting to spend the rest of my life with my husband

Describe a memory between you and your husband that really stands out in your mind.
The way he looked at my the night he proposed. I could just tell how much he loved me.

How did your relationship with your husband change when you became parents?
It is getting stronger as we learn together how to raise our children. It makes me love him even more to see how much he loves his children.

How does your parenting style compare with your husband's?
I think we have similar styles. We pretty much agree on how we do most things. He just rough houses more because he is stronger lol.

In what ways have you changed since you became a mother? I think I have become even more paranoid unfortunately because I am always scared something is going to happen to my kids, but other than that I think I have become more understanding as I try to see things from my children's perspective.

Describe a memory of pregnancy that stands out to you.
I loved both the times I felt both my kids move. It will never stop being amazing.

Describe a memory of your first weeks of motherhood that stands out to you.
Just having my little ones fall asleep on me. I love it when that happens.

In what ways has your parenting style changed with each child?
It is hard to say if my style differs because my son is so young so we are still in the adjusting phase.

In what ways are your children similar to each other and in what ways are they different?
Again hard to say for the most part since my son is so little, but he is more needy than she was. He wants to be held all the time.

In what ways are your children similar to you? In what ways are they different from you?
Haddie is more curious than I think I was. But she is a litte fireball like I was.

For each of your children, share one of your favorite memories.
I don't think I can pick just one. But I love when she starts to understand things and she gets so proud of herself. With Aedan I was so glad to be able to see him right after he was born since I was awake for his c- section.

Describe a moment as a mother where you felt overwhelmed.
When both my children are crying at the same time.

What are your favorite ways to relax when you need a little break?
Probably watch tv or sleep, and read if I have a good book.

What has been the hardest lesson you have had to learn as a mother?
I will have to let them go someday.

What has been the hardest experience you have gone through as a mother? What did that experience teach you?
One thing is just the process of how they came into the world. I did not want a c-section and I have had to have two. I am now able to deal with the fact that God has his own plan in mind and I just need to go with it.

Looking back on your life as a mother, what, if anything, do you regret?
Getting too upset at times.

What do you think is the most important quality in a mother?
Understanding.

What do you think children need most from their mothers?
Unconditional love.

What advice would you give to other mothers out there who are reading this interview?
Just breathe.

Do you have any tips or tricks that have helped you stay organized, run your household or raise your kids more effectively?
Just stay on top of things as best you can. Everything can get out of hand real quick. I know from way too much experience that the house gets super messy before you know it.

Get-through-your-Monday Girl Time - SuperMom Teresa Legere

It´s Monday again, and that means it´s ¨Get-through-your-Monday Girl Time¨! Today we have an interview from a supermom who will challenge and encourage you. When I think of Teresa and her family, there is one memory that always sticks out in my mind. When I lived in Maine, I lived with a pastor and his family, and helped translate for their newly adopted Guatemalan daughter. She was becoming good friends with Teresa´s daughters, and I was called upon one afternoon to translate as the pastor and his wife told their little daughter that one of those little girls had passed away, and the other was in the hospital in critical condition. Since then, I have seen how God has used this tragedy in Teresa´s family to do wonderful things, both within their family and throughout the world (no exaggeration!). I hope this glimpse into Teresa´s life will help you refresh your perspective on motherhood, and the true reason we become mothers. Enjoy!

-Ashley

Tell us a little bit about yourself. Who are you?
I grew up in a small town in Maine, the youngest of 5 girls.  I married my best friend when I was 21 and we have remained together through good times and bad.  I am 38 years old. I worked as a nurse for 11 years before deciding to stay at home to raise my family.

Tell us about your family.
I grew up in a home with a Christian mom who took me to church every week. My dad was less involved when I was younger, but I am glad to say that he has now come to know the Lord and he and my mom are very actively involved in their church. My older sisters are a very important part of my life as well as the life of my children. 

How many children do you have, and what are their ages?
I have 6 daughters:
Grace was 9 years old when she went home to be with Jesus 4 years ago.
Sarah is 12, Deanna is 11, Hannah is 5, Anita is 3.
Our 6th daughter is coming to us from Latvia later this year. She is 5 years old as well.

*Update: Since this interview, Teresa´s 6th daughter has been officially adopted. Here´s what Teresa says: ¨Allison came home with us in August, the adoption was finalized in November, and she had to return in December to finalize her passport/ visa hearing with the US Embassy. She was a great Christmas present!¨

This is an interview about motherhood, but your motherhood is shaped a lot by your marriage. How would you describe your relationship with your husband?
My husband is my absolute best friend.  We have been together for almost 23 years and I cannot imagine my life without him.  After God, he is my Rock.  He keeps me grounded.  He has remained faithful to me through my emotional ups and downs.  He knows me better than any other person.  (sometimes he even knows me better than I know myself).   After the death of our daughter we were warned that our marriage could suffer.  Just the opposite happened.  We bonded together stronger then ever and keep growing closer every single day. 

What is the hardest thing about being married?
Communication!  Men and women communicate differently and it often is the cause of much misunderstanding.  It takes a tender man to be sensitive enough to his wife to truly “listen” to her heart.  It takes a strong woman to be able to go beyond her emotions to talk through hurts. 

What is the best thing about being married?
Spending every day of your life with your best friend!

Describe a memory between you and your husband that really stands out in your mind.
There are so many, but I guess the first one that comes to mind is sitting in the back of my brother-in-law’s car as he drove us from one hospital where we had just heard our oldest daughter declared dead to another hospital where our youngest daughter had been flown due to a skull fracture.  We sat there in the dark holding hands and crying. I remember asking him, “Are we going to be OK?”  Without hesitation, he leaned over and kissed me and reassured me that everything was going to be OK.  I knew then and there that we would become stronger as a result of this tragedy.

How did your relationship with your husband change when you became parents?
We didn’t become parents in the “traditional” way. After 6 years of infertility we adopted a sibling group of 3 sisters from Romania. We went from 0 to 3 over night!  It was a whirlwind and it turned our lives completely upside down.  My husband, true to form, remained solid and would redirect me when my lack of sleep led to emotional upheavals.  I wouldn’t say that our relationship “changed” but was further enhanced by the addition of our girls.  Parenting brings out the best and the worst in us, forcing us to deal with our issues.

How does your parenting style compare with your husband´s?
My husband tends to be the more patient parent.  I am more short tempered and see things very black and white. 

However, our styles tend to compliment each other. When one of us is struggling to deliver the much needed grace that our girls need, the other parent steps in.  When one of us struggles with deciding on a consequence for a family offense, the other one will remind the group of our set family rules.  It is a definite team approach to parenting.

In what ways have you changed since you became a mother?
I would have to say that becoming a mother has taught me patience and grace.  As I mentioned before, parenting brings out the best and worst in us.  Issues that you could “hide” before you had kids become front and center when you have children.  God has a funny way of using our children to bring out emotions and behaviors that you have tried for years to ignore in yourself.  You are forced to deal with them when they happen in front of your children.  You can’t hide anything from your kids.  This has forced me to take a very painful road of counseling and deep soul searching to recognize some very negative traits in myself that needed to be changed. 

Describe a memory of pregnancy that stands out to you.
Our children are all adopted so I have no “pregnancy” story; however, if you would like a detailed story of mountains of paperwork, doctors appointments, birth certificates, dossiers, apostillements, embassy hearings, court dates, etc. I’d be happy to fill you in.  When you are pregnant you may feel physically violated at every step of the way. When you adopt you are violated in every aspect of your life….your home, your marriage, your finances, your emotional stability, your physical fitness.  There are NO secrets. You need to fully document every aspect of your parenting plan from what you will feed the children on the first day home to what plans you have in place in the event of your untimely demise.  It can be a little intimidating to have to think about these things when you haven’t even met your precious little angels yet!  

On top of the bureaucratic nightmare you have to deal with constant comments and unsolicited advice from well intentioned family members all the way up to complete strangers.  (I have heard that this is true for pregnancy as well and I am at least thankful that complete strangers don’t approach me and touch my belly!)

“Now that you are adopting you’ll get pregnant!”-Well, gee, that’s exactly why I started all of this. I had some sick notion that if I started to fully engage myself in the adoption journey for one of the 147 million orphans in the world that I would somehow miraculously become pregnant and just put this all aside!
“They’re from Africa?  Will they be black?”-Duh!

“What if they have a disease?”-What if they do?  My precious Grace was healthy as a horse and was struck by a car 12 miles from my home.  There are no guarantees in life.

“Why don’t you adopt from America?”-Because my child(ren) is/ are not from America.

“Those children are so lucky.”-No. WE are the lucky ones!

 “Are they real sisters?”-Well, yes, I suppose they are.

“Are you their real mother?”-Last I checked.  I sometimes feel like Pinocchio and want to shout “I’m a real boy!” 

“I couldn’t do that.”-You’re right. You probably couldn’t.

Describe a memory of your first weeks of motherhood that stands out to you.
Sitting on the washing machine, rocking back and forth saying, “I can’t do this. We need to send them back.”  To which my sweet, dear husband replied, ‘Well honey, we can’t give them back. We need to figure this out together.” And…we did!

In what ways has your parenting style changed with each child?
We currently have 2 very distinct sets of children.  We are parenting 2 pre teens, while parenting 2 preschoolers.  Ugh! 

I have said all along that it is much easier the “second” time around.  The addition of our 5 and 3 year old to the family 20 months ago went fairly smooth.  It is easier when you have the older girls to help out. Plus, you have the knowledge that all of the irritating phases that your children go through are just that…a phase….and that it will pass and that you will survive!

In what ways are your children similar to each other and in what ways are they different?
Our children are certainly all very unique. However, it is funny to see similarities between our 11 year old and the 5 year old.  They are both very passionate and emotional.  This causes some interesting clashes between them, but usually it is due to their similarities.

In what ways are your children similar to you? In what ways are they different from you?
My 11 year old is an exact replica of me…crazy since she was knit together in her biological mom’s belly and not mine.  We are so similar that my husband often calls her “Little T” (my name is Teresa).  She carries her heart on her sleeve and you always know exactly what she is thinking. She is extremely passionate and feels things from her toes.  When she is angry…she is ANGRY!  When she is loving…she is sweet as can be.   I see so many similarities between her and me it is scary. I was definitely predestined to be her mother.

For each of your children, share one of your favorite memories.
Grace loved horses. She was happiest on our annual family vacations to the Outer Banks where the wild horses roam free.  She would just run care free down the beach and watch the horses for hours on end.

Sarah is my serious, more refined daughter.  She is very quiet, yet witty.  Just when you least expect it she can come up with some very funny, dry humor.  While stopped at a stop light one day we saw a small hatchback with a picnic table strapped to the top.  The top of the table laid out on the top of the car, with the legs pointing up to the sky.  After a few moments of awkward silence, Sarah finally broke the silence with a quiet, “Huh….now there’s something you don’t see every day.”  We all broke into hysterical laughter.

Dee is a swimmer. She has been on our local swim team for 7 years.  My favorite memory was watching her at our state meet when she was about 8 years old. She was an entire lane behind the fastest swimmer in her heat. Once she made her flip turn and realized she was far behind she kicked it in and ended up winning her heat.  She looked up at the score board and saw that she had come in first and pumped her little fist in the air. It was priceless!

Hannah is so full of life! She is constantly moving, dancing, singing.  I often look up from what I am doing and can see her shaking her little body to whatever music is on. 

Anita is the baby of the family.  She is such a sweetheart and a snuggle bug.  I love rocking her to sleep every night. When she was still sucking her thumb she would lie in my arms, sucking her thumb with her right hand and she would gently place her left hand, palm open, on my face while I would sing softly to her.

Describe a moment as a mother where you felt overwhelmed.
Just one?!?  Ha!  I generally have at least one overwhelmed moment each day.  When you are a stay at home mom with 4 children, trying to homeschool 2 of them while keeping the other 2 out of trouble, help your husband with a foundation to help bring hope and healing to orphans and vulnerable children, be the wife of a pastor to a church plant to the downtown city filled with broken people and 10,000 refugees from Africa, serve at your local community outreach facility with homework help and meals it is easy to become overwhelmed.  Oh yeah…and don’t forget trying to keep your marriage alive and happy while cooking, cleaning and carpooling to music lessons, soccer, dance, swim and play dates.   If you don’t stay grounded in the Lord and keep your priorities straight you can easily become overwhelmed with the details of life and forget why you are really doing all of this…to grow and nurture these children to love the Lord and to grow into adults who love and serve Him.

What are your favorite ways to relax when you need a little break?
Go out to lunch with my girlfriends. Or take a walk.

What has been the hardest lesson you have had to learn as a mother?
That our children do not belong to us. They belong to God and He only lends them to us….sometimes for a short period of time.

What has been the hardest experience you have gone through as a mother? What did that experience teach you?
The hardest thing I ever had to do as a mother was to bury my daughter.  It has taught me to not take anything for granted. Each day is a gift. Treat it as such!  It is sometimes hard to do in the stress of every day life with children but try to find at least one moment each day when you can look at your children and cherish the treasure that they are.

Looking back on your life as a mother, what, if anything, do you regret?
Not playing more with my girls when they were younger.  If I had it to do over again, I would have left the real cooking and the cleaning so that I could enjoy pretend pies, sidewalk chalk and sand castles with my girls.

What do you think is the most important quality in a mother?
I think every child needs different things from their mother, but overall I would have to say that consistency is the key.  If your children know what to expect from you then they will feel secure in themselves. They will know that you love them by holding them accountable to consistent rules and consequences (maybe not right away but they will as they grow older).

What do you think children need most from their mothers?
To feel loved.  No matter what they do they need to know that you will love them with an unconditional love.

What advice would you give to other mothers out there who are reading this interview?
Stop being so hard on yourself!  You don’t have to be the perfect mother nor do you have to raise the perfect children. Just be willing to learn from your mistakes, laugh at yourself and teach your children what it looks like to be honest about your short comings.

Do you have any tips or tricks that have helped you stay organized, run your household or raise your kids more effectively?
Ha ha!  This is funny.  I think this is a constant battle for all mothers; regardless of where you live.  You can live in a mud hut in Africa or a 5800 square foot home in America and every mother struggles with organization.  No matter how hard you try to keep life organized, your children will always throw a wrench in the plan when they decide to live with you. And that is what kids do…they LIVE with you. They are messy, creative, artistic, inquisitive. All of these things involve messes!  You can have things in place to help you stay organized to a certain degree but please don’t allow your organizational plans to interfere with your children exploring all of their potential to become the person God wants them to be.

Any final thoughts you´d like to share?
Motherhood is hard.  Find some good friends. Not fake friends….REAL friends! The last thing you need is women who are pretending that everything is perfect.  If someone tries to sell you that line of goods…RUN FAR AND FAST from her!  She is a liar!  You need brutally honest, real women around you to help you on this journey.

Get-through-your-Monday Girl Time - SuperMom Julia Rodrick

This Monday morning, or as we affectionately call it around here, ¨Get-through-your-Monday Girl Time¨ we have a very special treat. We have an interview from a veteran mom today, with lots of experience. She has four kids, three of which are pretty cool, and one of which is AWESOME. It´s my mom! (And I am the awesome one. Just in case that wasn´t clear.) I really enjoyed reading this interview, and I think you will appreciate the hard-earned wisdom she has to share. Raising me was a joy, no doubt, but even the most wonderful children have a few lessons for their mom´s, right? Ok, enough of that, on to the good stuff. Coffee? Check. Comfy slippers? Check. Back massage from husband? Check. Well, maybe not, but a girl can dream! Here it comes! Enjoy!

-Ashley

Tell us a little bit about yourself. Who are you?
I’m Julia Rodrick. I am the wife to Phillip. I am the mom to Tina, Todd, Nick and Ashley. I am also the grandma to Travis, Brandon, Bryce, Paige, Isabella and Maddox.

Tell us about your family.
We are a blended family. My two oldest children are from my husband’s first marriage. Our “middle” son is from my first marriage and our youngest is ours, together. In spite of this “blending” I believe our family dynamics reflect a unity that is rare and blessed. I don’t think our kids think of themselves as having “step” relationships with each other. It hasn’t always been easy but I like to think that each of our kids know that we (My husband and I) hold each of them as close in heart equally. There is no “yours” or “mine”, just ours…

How many children do you have, and what are their ages?
Four; Tina 40, Todd 35, Nicholas 30 and Ashley 25

This is an interview about motherhood, but your motherhood is shaped a lot by your marriage. How would you describe your relationship with your husband?
I would say Committed and loyal. We aren’t always best friends but we are  always  in love.

What is the hardest thing about being married?
I believe marriage is about “dying to self” everyday, and doing it willingly. That’s difficult because to do that requires total trust that your spouse will do the same…scary stuff

What is the best thing about being married?
Despite the challenges, it’s fun. It’s an adventure each day.

Describe a memory between you and your husband that really stands out in your mind.
So many…I remember when we bought our first ford truck. I wasn’t thrilled because I didn’t see how it would be something I would use…My husband surprised me the night he brought it home by placing soft blankets in the back, bought wine and chicken to create a picnic in the back of the truck (while Randy Travis’ “Forever and Ever, Amen” played in the background…very sweet)

How did your relationship with your husband change when you became parents?
We were already parents so I can’t say it changed…I will say that it was a challenge to transition from having one 2 ½ year old boy to three kids (including a pre-teen).

How does your parenting style compare with your husband´s?
He is a man of few words when it comes to discipline.  He has a way of communicating expectations and the kids never challenged it.  I am an over-communicator so I’m sure I wore my kids out.

In what ways have you changed since you became a mother?
I hope I am less selfish. I hope that I am more generous. I know that I am much more committed to Christ

Describe a memory of pregnancy that stands out to you.
My two pregnancies were physically demanding. I was very ill during my first. Blood pressures and protein levels were abnormal most of the time. I was hospitalized. I gained a lot of weight. They thought my son “wouldn’t be right” and suggested I terminate the pregnancy at first. I couldn’t do it. It’s amazing how you can love a child when they are just a hope…no bigger than a lima bean. My first husband was absent emotionally so I felt very much alone. I focused all my attention on staying as healthy as possible for the baby. It was difficult because I was trying to finish college and had to work part-time.  My second time around, I was sick but had a lot of emotional support from my new husband. We were excited.

Describe a memory of your first weeks of motherhood that stands out to you.
It felt natural, even though I spent most of the time on the couch nursing. Having my son in my arms was calming. He was a good baby.

In what ways has your parenting style changed with each child?
I think each of our children are very different and we eventually learned that each required a different approach. A firm hand worked for our oldest son…it NEVER worked for our youngest daughter.

In what ways are your children similar to each other and in what ways are they different?
Tina is guarded but very loyal to those she loves. She is giving and patient, creative and sensible. Todd is very black and white. He needs control, is very strong-willed, but can be very loving. Nick is a funny, creative, bold young man with an intense sense of duty. He loves life and loves with passion. Ashley is strong-willed, but fair. She loves deeply and with fierce loyalty. She is a philosopher and dreamer but is sensible. She likes to plan life and used to get pretty frustrated when life didn’t conform to her plans. She is very funny and entertaining.

In what ways are your children similar to you? In what ways are they different from you?
I think the sense of loyalty comes from both my husband and me. I think the strong-will comes from me… I think the dreamer is from me but the sensible side is from my husband. I know it’s irritating to ALL my kids that I’m a morning person!

For each of your children, share one of your favorite memories.
Tina’s wedding day (wow, she was so beautiful), Todd when he hit the softball for the first time, he has some disability so that was HUGE! Nick’s first step. It was just him and me, playing after his bath and, after helping him to steady, he took two steps. I was amazed because he was so chubby I didn’t think he could balance. Ashley, the day she started to read. I knew she was going to be unstoppable. Of course her wedding was very special too…

Describe a moment as a mother where you felt overwhelmed.
Gee, just one moment…sometimes it has seemed that I felt overwhelmed for months! Most recently, I’d say the day my son returned after deployment. It was a very tough period in our family and great relief to have him home safe. It broke my heart as I realized how emotionally affected he was from his experience there. It still does.

What are your favorite ways to relax when you need a little break?
I like making jewelry, reading Max Lucado, shopping or enjoying a good movie.

What has been the hardest lesson you have had to learn as a mother?
That I’m not always right in my choices. I thank God that I have forgiving children...

What has been the hardest experience you have gone through as a mother? What did that experience teach you?
I’m still going through it, but I think that it’s that you can’t make choices for your (grown) children. Totally have to rely on God.

Looking back on your life as a mother, what, if anything, do you regret?
Working  full time. I know, with our situation, it was unavoidable but I wish I would have been around more. I so relate to young moms who try to balance work with family. It’s so difficult.

What do you think is the most important quality in a mother?
Faith, know what you believe. Grace, extending to your children at all times; Integrity, don’t compromise your faith. Protection but balancing when to let go (still learning that one, even after all these years)

What do you think children need most from their mothers?
Humor, Love, confirmation that they are special and worthwhile. Forgiveness when they “screw-up”

What advice would you give to other mothers out there who are reading this interview?
After 30 years, I’m still learning so, I’d say the reality of that would be that life is a process. Hang in there,  enjoy your children, be genuine and honest and fair… don’t sweat the small stuff…

Do you have any tips or tricks that have helped you stay organized, run your household or raise your kids more effectively?
Do a little each day to stay ahead. Teach your kids early to clean up after themselves. Make it fun. Don’t judge perfection…if the bed is crooked, they missed some crumbs, etc. but they tried… yeah for them!